


Christmas in Blood Gulch

by TheMaskedViola



Category: Red vs Blue
Genre: Christmas, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-26
Updated: 2013-12-26
Packaged: 2018-01-06 04:44:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1102555
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheMaskedViola/pseuds/TheMaskedViola
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Caboose reeeeaallly wants to make a great Christmas present for Church, his absolute bestest friend. Made as a secret Santa fic on tumblr!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Christmas in Blood Gulch

Tucker was in his bunk trying to sleep when he heard a noise that awoke him from his dream, which really pissed him off because he was dreaming about these two hot blonde twins and they were- "Tucker.... Tucker!" The soldier in the teal armor looked up at the annoying presence in his barracks. "What the hell do you want, Caboose?!" The last thing that Tucker wanted to wake up to was Caboose's stupid self. "Well uhhh... I was just wonderiing... Maybe if you had any spare metal that you weren't using? Possibly? Just a little?" Tucker looked at the idiot with a look that pretty much spelled out what he was thinking, which was "why the hell did you wake me up from a wonderful dream to ask if I had any scrap metal". They stayed like that for a second until Cavoose finally spoke up, "You know, that's okay. I'll come back later..." He walked back out of the base. Tucker groaned and tried to get back to sleep. Why did he even enlist in this stupid army?  
"Listen, all I'm saying is that you're pronouncing milk wrong." Grif suggested to the maroon soldier. "All I'm saying is that I have no idea what you're talking about. I say melk just fine!" Simmons rolled his eyes. "See! You just said it! It's milk, not melk!" "What the fuck are you talking about? I said melk!" Grif sighed, "I'm telling you, you're saying it differently. I just don't understand it." "I don't understand most things." Another voice came from behind Grif. The orange soldier shrieked and jumped, looking at the intruder, Caboose. "Wh- what the hell, why would you sneak up on us like that?" The blue soldier, "I thought you knew I was there." There was an innocence in his voice, he truly thought the two soldiers knew that he was there. "Why are you even over here? We're not on the same teams, dude! Our objective is to take you out. Why are you here?!" Caboose looked around, "Oh well you know.... I was just wondering if you had any extra metal you could lend to me." Simmons shook his head, "Why would we give you our scrap metal? We don't know what you would do with that! You could be plotting to attack us with some machine and we would be responsible for giving you the metal!" Caboose stood there for a while before speaking, "Yeah whatever you just said, I don't know what you're talking about but I wanted to use the metal to make Church a Christmas gift and then he'll be my bestest friend and we'll be happy." The two red soldiers stared at Caboose flabbergasted. "Ohhhhhkay... Well we don't have any... So you should go before we realize that we need to kill you." Caboose sighed and walked out again, continuing his search for scrap metal for Church's Christmas present. "Why don't we ever make each other presents in our base, Simmons?" "Because I hate you, Grif. And you shriek like a little girl." The maroon soldier walked off.  
"Hey, Lopez. I think you're doing that wrong, it's lefty loosy, righty tighty. You're doing it the wrong way." The gruff sargeant of the red team was supervising the mechanical robot trying to fix their warthog, the only vehicle they even had, which seemed to always have something the matter with it. Sarge blamed it on "those damn blues" and Grif. The robot made a sighing noise, "Usted no podría decir su izquierda de su derecha, incluso si alguien lo escribió en usted, mono idiota." (you could not tell your left from your right even if someone wrote it on you, idiotic monkey). Sarge grunted, "Don't be ridiculous, Lopez. The reason we haven't won the war yet is completely Grif's fault. We all know that. Get back to work." The red armored soldier walked away, grumbling to himself. Lopez started again on fixing the jeep when another annoyance walked up on him. "Hey uh... Lopez? Hey buddy... Uhhh.." Caboose walked around the warthog like this was a normal conversation. "So how's it going?" "¿Por qué te importa? Ni siquiera habla español." (Why do you care? You don't even speak spanish.) Caboose nodded, "Ha ha, yeah. That is funny. Anyways.... I was just coming over here to ask if you had any scrap metal? You know... Just lying around." Lopez looked act him for a second before asking, "Quieres decir que viniste hasta llegar a la base de tu enemigo para pedir la chatarra?" (you mean you came all the way to your enemy's base to ask for scrap metal?) "So was that a yes or no?" "No." The robot was thoroughly tired of the stupidity radiating through this canyon. Caboose sighed, "I don't see how no one could have any scrap metal." He walked off again on his search for scrap metal to make Church the best Christmas gift there had ever been.  
It was about midnight when Tucker heard loud noises coming from the room next to his, which was Caboose's bunk. And it wasn't like the usual noises, like snoring or the sound of him falling out of bed because he was dreaming about flying. No these were the kinds of sounds that were like he was trying to attack a vicious metal dog with a squeaky hammer. At first the aqua soldier tried to ignore the loud sounds, but then it kept going on and made it almost impossible to sleep and so he finally had to get up, residing to kill Caboose and make it look like an accident. He made his way to Caboose's room and pounded on the door. There was a moment of complete silence, not even the metal dog was making any noise anymore. The door opened slightly ajar and the dark blue soldier peeked his head out to look at Tucker. "Tucker, why would you be knocking at my door this late at night, some of us actually sleep this time of night." "What the hell, Caboose?! You're making way too much noise in here. What are you even doing?" He stood up higher tryingt do get a look into seeing what Caboose was up to. The dark blue soldier blocked his view purposefully and started talking nervously, "I don't know what you're talking about. I'm not making anything." "I never said you were making anything, you just told me." "I don't know how you found out about the present but I can't tell you anything." "What present are you even talking about?" "You know too much, Tucker. You need to go now before you find out about Church's Christmas present." "Church's Christmas present? Is this another one of your schemes to get Church to be your friend again?" "Tucker I don't know what you're talking about. I think I hear my oven going off, I'm going to have to go." "You don't even have an oven, Caboose!" Caboose was making a buzzing sound with his mouth, "yeah the cookies are definitely done, I'm gonna have to go now, Tucker. Goodnight." He shut the door quickly in Tucker's face leaving the guy on the outside of the door with a large headache. "What an idiot.." He walked back to his room to endure the rest of the night of The ruckus coming from Caboose.   
As dawn broke on the new day in Blood Gulch, there was a kind of jolly feeling in the air. Snow was falling, it could have been ash, and for one day peace was kept. It was Christmas among the red and blue bases. Church got up groggily, ready to start the day. Emerging from the dark base, he could see it was pretty light outside. He just hoped it stayed a quiet Christmas all day.  
"Hey Church.. Church!" The sound of the soldier's voice almost made Church trip from the sudden ubruptness. "What do you want Caboose...." He turned to the sight of Caboose holding something behind his back. "It's Christmas, Church!" Church could only imagine if he could see the kid's eyes they would be sparkling. "Yeah, Caboose... It's Christmas." He could tell the soldier was jittery like he was excited... Or he had to go to the bathroom, either or. "What's behind your back, Caboose?" He actually had a genuine care about that, Church still remembered when Caboose initiated the hot potato game with a live grenade. "Well it's Christmas so... I got you a present." He pulled out an odd, oblong shape that was crudely covered with paper, just regular paper. He handed it to Church who took the package carefully and took off the "wrapping". What was left was a small link of weird chains like someone had formed them together. "Uhhh... It's great, Caboose. What is it?" He scanned the link, not seeing an actual purpose for it. "It's a friendship bracelet!" He held out his own arm to reveal a similar type of link around his wrist. "So even if we get separated, we will remember each other. Because you're my best friend, right Church?" Church looked at the other soldier. "Of course, Caboose. Thank you. I'll wear it all the time." Caboose smiled, glad that his efforts finally paid off. And for Church, it was looking to be the start of a great Christmas Day.


End file.
